I hope you have been well during this amazing hot summer. I have been taking a supreme delight in all this heat. Like, an obscene delight. This is like all my Christmases at once. I have been able to enjoy my dream London vibe with USA East Coast summer weather in this city that is far more enticing and homey for me than anyplace near where I was born.
Siiiiighh…. so wonderful.
The holiday of Lammas was last week, on August 1st, marking the mid point between summer solstice – the longest day of the year – and the autumn equinox, when day and night are equal. Traditionally the celebration of the first grain harvest, this is a time of year when I reflect on the harvest of my life choices so far this year. Taking stock, celebrating my victories, and determining which actions have not worked so well.
Overall, I feel my sensitivity has deepened this year, which is a beautiful thing. I have recovered from a deep subtle-body breakdown, and an attendant low back injury. Beloved friends have been working with major illness, which has brought me into a deeper contemplation of my ageing and my aims in life, and what’s really important. At the same time, there has been a deeper ease in life, just across the board, which I account for by my dedicated practice of flow in life, a conserted effort and intention this year.
I was recently reminded that I am an Enneagram Four – and in the writings on this personality style, Fours are encouraged to not base their actions on their emotions.
I felt a little ping as I read this. This has been my biggest productivity block in life. I feel a call to become more even-handed in my work with regard to ‘the fickle muse’. I certainly don’t need to feel ‘just so’ to do some of my daily work. The greatest block: posting on Instagram. BOY do I want to feel a certain way – to ‘feel like sharing’ – before I post. But sharing the rudiments and nuances of my teaching practice, and sharing the juicy details of my spiritual practice – this doesn’t just serve my business… it serves humanity. It serves the peeps who can’t make it to class, or who doesn’t feel comfortable in the yoga room – it serves people in ways I can’t predict.
In fact, I had the revelation (I can’t belive it took me to my mid-forties to allow myself to know this about myself) – that I tend to ISOLATE MYSELF on the basis of how I feel.And that my Instagram-itis, my resistance to posting, is a part of this tendency to isolate. Now that I understand this – I can enter into some consideration of how I can flow differently in this aspect of life.
So, this is a very good Lammas contemplation-based insight.
What has worked for you in 2018? How have you grown, and what have you grown? What ‘plants’ will you weed out of your garden, to give you space to sew anew a more auspicious crop?
Let me know. I love to hear from you.
Meanwhile, I’m here until August 17th with my regular class rounds… then off for a major trip to take workshops with some very inspiring teachers. Not back until September 18! Big trip. Come see me before I go. x