Hey There Beauty,
How’s you? If you are new to my (very occassional) newsletter world, welcome, and thanks for jumping in.
As for me, I’m defs experiencing the challenges of this seasonal transition here in London. I’ve injured myself a little (not sure what I’ve done) and the damp is making me a shade achier than I usually am on top of it. Ay, ay, ay.
I really am seeing how pain shifts me into this very defensive relationship to the world. Since this little injury I find myself inwardly bitching more, ragging on my life and the way things are. Pain really kicks up my narratives of distortion. And I have been in the scheming mind too.
When I say scheming, I mean trying to plan and plot and schedule – all ordinary stuff in life – but from a place of trying to make a current discomfort go away. I have noticed a clear distinction between the way I forward-plan my life when I am in my small mind, contracted with physical pain or some psychic discontent (resistance to reality), and the way I administrate my life when I am not trying to quell any internal discomforts. Small mind is scheming. Other states contain the various flavours of creative flow.
I honour and send my heartfelt love to my friends and students who experience chronic pain. Adyashanti has called pain ‘a relentless teacher’. Isn’t it though? It really calls you to the choice – how are you going to respond? Which is the only thing you ever have any control over. Pain is asking me how I want to play it eighty gazillion times a minute. That’s how it rolls.
After trying to scheme my way through my admin day yesterday, I finally got straight with myself, got out the blankets and the bolster and practiced some of the intelligent rest curriculum from The Practices Freedom and Wellbeing Immersion. Got quiet enough to taste the bliss inside the yuck. (Phew). Finally a night of reasonable sleep followed, and when I rose I did a little bodywork on myself. I am still in pain but today I am tending to spend my time in the self-care not the scheming. Unsurprisingly, I am more productive and able to access bliss even with the dull ache and sharp twinges.
When the weather is gloomy and cold and the light grows long, you don’t even have to be in pain to get into bitching and scheming.
And because I know how easy it is to fall prey to it, I offer this blessing:
May you also get blissing as we move into the long light this Spring.
Blessings of High Love in this transition